Wednesday, December 17, 2014

The 8 Days of Christmas Sweaters 2014: Day 1

     And it came to pass, that in these days a decree was issued to find the most festive garments in all the land, to warm our upper halves and our hearts.  Behold, I bring you good tidings of great yarn that shall be for all people. For today, in the state of begins the seventh annual 8 Days of Christmas Sweaters!

     Before we begin I must address a dirty little trend, that has spread faster than the fear of ebola, in calling these delicacies "ugly sweaters".  It is a travesty to malign these majestic creations of the finest craftsmanship in such a way.  And furthermore, these festive finds were worn in all seriousness by my mother throughout my childhood, and nobody calls my mama or what she wears "ugly".  These are creations to be celebrated.  And with that let's begin.

     Inaugurating this years collection is this little piece of patchwork perfection.  This button up cardi will have your friends exclaiming, "nutcracker sweet!", with that little bearded fellow standing guard upon your abdomen.  But what really makes this sweater sparkle is the sequined poinsettias that would make even Tina Turners head turn.  Simply the best.  Rounding out this textural smorgasbord is the shaggy christmas tree complete with hand-sewn bead ornaments, reminiscent of your old Sunday School carpet after craft time.  Don't expect eye contact in this dandy piece of eye candy.


dave and karen said...

Oh Shannon! This is priceless. Thank you for making our day. What a good laugh! We love the descriptors you give.

Laura E. said...

This is amazing! Great start to the 8 days of 2014! Also. You look like Zooey dechanelle. The end.

Katie said...

oh Shannon, this was just what I needed! After a long, challenging day, this made me laugh so hard! Thank-you!!! You've really outdone yourself this year! "Simply the best"! amazing. p.s. you're beautiful, and I love your bangs! p.p.s. next time you're in Canada I would love to see you!!!! p.p.p.s. if you have time, please email me some updates :)

Anonymous said...

Let it be known to all: I USED to wear them! :-) They were donated to Goodwill (MCC) a long time ago. But if they proved your inspiration, mission accomplished.

Your Mother

Shannon said...

Katie! I will email you! Do you have the same email address?
And yes, Mom, USED to wear them. Now she is very fashion forward.